By Rachel Loftspring
Back-to-school can be an exciting – and overwhelming – time for both kids and parents. The sun-filled days of summer shift into the scheduled school days of fall, often with new routines, new teachers, and new classmates. Mornings before school can be hectic and stressful, especially at the beginning of the school year. The non-stop and structured nature of the school day itself can be draining, particularly as kids get used to the new schedule. There are often after school activities and homework. It’s a lot.
To help ease the transition from summer vacation into the school year, here are 5 strategies that have worked for my elementary school-aged kids:
Strategy 1: Plan the Mornings in Advance.
Mornings are hard. There never seems to be enough time and yet there is so much to do.
A strategy to get ahead of this inevitability is to have several discussions with your kids about what the morning will look like prior to the first day of school. Come up with a game plan together of exactly what needs to be done and when to keep the mornings under control. Planning together leads to predictability and buy in. It’s not the parent telling the kid what to do, it’s teamwork.
My kids need an hour to get ready, and we break that hour into three 20-minute segments. In the first 20 minutes, they wake up, get dressed, and brush their teeth and hair. In the second 20 minutes, they eat breakfast. In the final 20 minutes, they make their lunch, pack their backpacks, and put their bags, shoes, and coats by the door. If there is any leftover time, they can use their iPads – small rewards go a long way for my kids.
Be willing to follow your child’s lead, which helps with buy in, but also stand your ground when something simply is not working. For example, my kids often want to eat breakfast before getting dressed, but this is an unmitigated disaster for us so is not an option. You may find that laying out clothing the night before helps with decision-making in the morning. Or that having lunches or bags packed in advance alleviates morning chaos. Continue discussing the mornings with your children and tweak as necessary.
Strategy 2: Plan the Afternoons in Advance.
Afternoons can be just as challenging as mornings, especially as kids are getting used to the new school day and all that is being asked of them during the course of the day. My kids are often totally spent by the time they get home in the afternoon. As with the mornings, I find it helpful to discuss the afternoon agenda with the kids in advance and get their input on what needs to get done – and what they need – when they get home in the afternoon.
For us, we start with going through their backpacks, emptying them, and putting the backpacks away. Then they have a snack and do homework. Once homework is done, the kids can have some time for iPad, reading, or playing.
Like many kids, mine often have afterschool activities, requiring some day-to-day flexibility. One way that works for us is to get ahead on homework whenever possible. For example, if the teacher assigns homework on Monday that is due Thursday, the kids will complete the homework on days without afterschool activities to avoid late nights finishing homework on the days that they do.
Strategy 3: Sleep. It is magic.
Sleep is absolutely essential. Without enough sleep, kids struggle to focus and to regulate emotions and behavior.
I have one child who falls asleep the moment his head hits the pillow. He needs at least 11 hours of sleep a night and without that is, as we lovingly call him, Captain Cranky-Pants. For him, we set a bedtime and do our very best to stick with it. My other child is a night owl and often goes to sleep after I do. While she naturally needs fewer hours than her brother, she struggles to fall asleep and get those magical hours. For her, we set a time by which she needs to be in her room in order to wind down with quiet play or reading.
I also try to create the best environment possible for her to fall asleep. There are no screens before bed. She has a warm-light lamp to use to read. We play either soft, calming music or bedtime stories, depending on her mood. Sometimes we use a diffuser with lavender essential oils, practice calming breathing together, or I guide her through a body scan meditation. She also loves using a kid-safe weighted blanket, which helps calm her body.
Strategy 4: Use Food to Fuel a Great Day.
Like sleep, a healthy, well-balanced diet is crucial for kids. Eating excess sugar and processed foods affects behavior, emotions, and ultimately overall health. And yet it feels like an ongoing battle to get kids to make healthy choices, particularly when they are constantly surrounded by foods that simply taste better: chips, ice cream, pizza, cakes, soft drinks, candy etc…
To combat this, we aim for a healthy breakfast with whole grains and proteins to fuel the kids for the morning. We make their lunches at home whenever possible, packed with healthy options they like to eat. We also talk a lot about what it means to eat a healthy, well-balanced diet. We teach them about whole grains, fruits, vegetables, and protein. And we explain that dessert is fine, in moderation, when they’ve otherwise fueled their bodies with the healthy foods they need.
Strategy 5: Exercise.
Hand and hand with healthy eating is exercise. Kids need time to run around and de-energize so they are able to focus and flourish during the school day. I have one kid for whom this is easy. His favorite school subject is recess, and he lives to be on a soccer field. My daughter is a bookworm and artist. She loves a big comfy chair. For her, we find family walks indispensable. They get her outside and moving, while also providing an opportunity for us to connect after our busy school and workdays.
With much to look forward to in the year ahead (not least of which, for parents, is the return to the regular schedule of the school day), I hope you find these strategies helpful for your family in the year ahead.
About
Rachel Loftspring is a Fertility Law Attorney who finds immense joy in helping hopeful parents build their families through surrogacy and gamete donation.
When she's not practicing law, Rachel is an author. Her debut children's book, Mila the Maker and the 200-Piece Jigsaw Puzzle, is a story about big feelings. Her work is inspired by her own children, Mila and Levi, who fill her life with laughter and creativity. Coffee fuels the rest. She resides with her husband and kids in Cincinnati, Ohio.
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